Matthew chapter 13 is such a cool chapter in the Bible. I read this chapter during an intense season of trial, where I wasn't spending quality, intentional time with God. I felt beaten down, defeated and just tired. I remember waking up at 5:30 (an hour before my alarm was set to go off) and thinking, I need to get up; God wants to spend time with me...and boy did he blow me away on this particular morning.
God speaks to us in absolutely incredible ways, through the Bible and his words. Often, when I slow down, and let him speak to me, I'm blown away and humbled in pretty extreme ways. Isn't it incredible that you read exactly what you need to at the right exact time?
What you read below is vulnerable, and honest. I write sometimes as a way of journaling my thoughts and feelings and to better learn and comprehend the lessons I believe God is trying to teach me. I hope this will speak to you too.
*Italicized words are from my study app-The Filament Bible*
”The seed that fell among the thorns represents those who hear God’s word, but all too quickly the message is crowded out by the worries of this life and the lure of wealth, so no fruit is produced. The seed that fell on good soil represents those who truly hear and understand God’s word and produce a harvest of thirty, sixty, or even a hundred times as much as had been planted!”“
Matthew 13:22-23 NLT
*Worries-diverting us from the path of faithful obedience
I laid in bed the night before just upset. Just upset and unsettled for so many reasons. I had hit a deer and my car was out of commission and going to be in the shop for at least a month. I had spent the last 10 days just SICK. SO incredibly sick. It was the last week of school, there was a million places I had to be, and now we were down to one car. I had expectations of things I wanted to get done and do that week that was just not going to happen. I was sad. I was feeling incredibly defeated. I felt like an unfit mother because how did I not see that deer? What if someone would have gotten hurt? What about my nice car that I love so much? Will it be ok? Financially what will this cost us? I was just all around a ball of anxious energy, and having the most evil whispers from the devil run through my head (because we all know thoughts that are anxious inducing, angry, sad, or cause shame are not from God).
After too much time spiraling, I pray and almost immediately feel that EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK. Everything is ok. The people I love are ok. We have another car. My husbands schedule is (somehow) not overly insane. I will be able to make it to the activities even though we will spend our week shuffling everyone around with one car. I have a husband who loves me, and is taking care of the situation for me. God's peace takes over my headspace, and his loving voice replaces the angry and nasty voice of the enemy.
I can tell you the car is apart of this lesson. I knew if it was totaled, I would not be buying another luxury car like that. I knew I would need to find a safe and practical car, with a very practical price tag. God had already been taking me through a season of finding my identity in him alone, not material, expensive items. Material items are not where we find our worth. That car is not any part of my identity. Those aren't kingdom ideas. I keep feeling an intense need to simplify all areas of my life to only the areas that are important to God and worthy of my time, energy and money. And here he is, just pushing me right towards that, because if we don't do it, he will do it for us. I can always look back and thank him for the seasons where he strips me of unworthy ideals and realigns my life to the things that glorify him.
KINGDOM IDEAS.
These two words keep coming to my head often in this season. My friend Lauren had said this simple, yet powerful phrase to me, and it has stuck with me ever since. What a powerful and significant phrase to completely shift your life around. If the idea isnt a "kingdom idea," it might not be worthy of your energy.
I can tell you with certainty, I believe that more than anything, God is teaching me deeper perseverance and endurance on the ONLY thing that matters: faithful obedience and trusting him no matter what happens and in every situation. When he is everything, the world can't cause us pain and we certainly won't be shaken when the world around us tries to shake us.
My mind goes straight to James Ch 1: ”Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.“
James 1:2-4 NLT
What an incredibly powerful verse to align your ideas and life to. I encourage you to memorize this, and sit with it. It's powerful.
After spending time with God, being mind-blown and so humbled, and on the drive to school, I explained the reading to my kids and talked to them about how I felt God was speaking to me through it. I speak to my children fully open and honest, and out of no where the song Firm Foundation pops into my head..so I turned it on in the car...
Joy in chaos
Peace that makes no sense
I'm not going under-I'm not held by my own strength
I build my life on Jesus-he's faithful in every season, why would he fail now-HE WONT
Rain came wind blew my house was built on you
I'm safe with you, I'm gonna make it through
God continues to mic drop on my life, and I continue to be in awe of how well he cares for me and loves me.
I feel that I keep learning the devils tactics, sometimes even laughing at him. I'm like oh no, I won't be taken down by this AGAIN. I persevere, overcome, and then he shifts. Just as soon as I can't be "shaken," I'm shaken. I know each season of trail allow me to become more refined and more like Jesus, but dang, these seasons come hard and fast from MANY directions. I think the more I go through them and make it though, the harder the enemy works and the more he throws at me, so much so that I'm like WOWZA TAKE IT EASY BRO (sometimes humor is the only way ha). I like to remind myself in these seasons that I am valuable, and he's only doing this to try and stop the work God is trying to do through me. What an honor to be so valuable that the devil has to work overtime to try and stop me from doing the work God wants to do through me.
*Gods desire for us: that we will have faith, obey, and willingly help those in need
This brings me to my faith. I long to have BIG FAITH. Faith that continues to get BIGGER, MORE BOLD, AND MORE TRUSTING OF GOD in ALL areas of my life. Faith, not only when things are easy or even semi-easy, but STRONG faith when things are bad, ugly and straight up disappointing. I believe that our faith is really defined and shines the brightest in the dark and ugly trials of lifewhere we let God's light shine and trust him, when we could have chosen a worldly path.
Parable of the mustard seed
“Here is another illustration Jesus used: “The Kingdom of Heaven is like a mustard seed planted in a field. It is the smallest of all seeds, but it becomes the largest of garden plants; it grows into a tree, and birds come and make nests in its branches.””
Matthew 13:31-32 NLT
*Insignificant beginnings and glorious consummation-exhort the disciples to patience
Once again, I'm reminded of the need for me to be more patient in his timing. We live in a high pace, instant gratification world, so I struggle with this. God's timing isn't my timing. God's timing is perfectly planned and executed. My timing is never right for me, unless it aligns with God's. Without sounding crazy, I think God has big big plans for my families lives (I guess I dont just think, I know because he has big plans for each and every one of us), and while I have no clue what those plans are, I think learning patience and enduring through the trials of life each time, is a test of faith. Each trial allows us to learn more about ourselves, see God more clearly, and allows him to refine us to become more like Christ. (At the time of this I absolutely felt as thought I was failing at this game of endurance if I am fully honest, but these seasons are also insane times of growth) The storms and trails will never stop in this earthly life, but with time, hopefully, we will have our roots planted so far down, that nothing can affect us
Parable of the Wheat and Weeds Explained
“Then, leaving the crowds outside, Jesus went into the house. His disciples said, “Please explain to us the story of the weeds in the field.” Jesus replied, “The Son of Man is the farmer who plants the good seed. The field is the world, and the good seed represents the people of the Kingdom. The weeds are the people who belong to the evil one. The enemy who planted the weeds among the wheat is the devil. The harvest is the end of the world, and the harvesters are the angels. “Just as the weeds are sorted out and burned in the fire, so it will be at the end of the world. The Son of Man will send his angels, and they will remove from his Kingdom everything that causes sin and all who do evil. And the angels will throw them into the fiery furnace, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth. Then the righteous will shine like the sun in their Father’s Kingdom. Anyone with ears to hear should listen and understand!”
Matthew 13:36-43 NLT
*Disciples must learn patience
PATIENCE
God's timing over our own timing. We have to be patient in his timing, faithful in our patience and steadfast in our endurance. This includes self-control and our need to take care of things. KINGDOM IDEAS.
Parable of the hidden treasure and the pearl
““The Kingdom of Heaven is like a treasure that a man discovered hidden in a field. In his excitement, he hid it again and sold everything he owned to get enough money to buy the field. “Again, the Kingdom of Heaven is like a merchant on the lookout for choice pearls. When he discovered a pearl of great value, he sold everything he owned and bought it!”
Matthew 13:44-46 NLT
*Kingdoms value exceeds all treasure
*EVERYTHING should be forfeited to acquire it
*Kingdom-greater than an temporal pleasure
Kingdom>all else
God wants to ABUNDANTLY bless us, but I also know we have to give up everything worldly to fully to be able to be blessed by him
”If you refuse to take up your cross and follow me, you are not worthy of being mine. If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it.“
Matthew 10:38-39
He requires all of us, and until we fully die to self, we can't experience Him. We will always find something or someone to be our "God" of sorts due to our worldly nature. The devil is so loud within this world telling us the things that we NEED to feel worthy or dare I say significant.
God truly is everything. He's so incredible. He's everywhere, showing up for us and exuding his love. When I'm closest to him, I sometimes feel like I'm floating on clouds. I see him in everything, in everyone. Theres joy and the peace I feel is unlike anything I've ever experienced on earth. So knowing that, I'm not sure why I would ever allow the devil to win in any area of my life (my thoughts, my actions my identity, my worth), yet I do.
He's so mean. God is so loving.
Jesus Rejected at Nazareth
“When Jesus had finished telling these stories and illustrations, he left that part of the country. He returned to Nazareth, his hometown. When he taught there in the synagogue, everyone was amazed and said, “Where does he get this wisdom and the power to do miracles?” Then they scoffed, “He’s just the carpenter’s son, and we know Mary, his mother, and his brothers—James, Joseph, Simon, and Judas. All his sisters live right here among us. Where did he learn all these things?” And they were deeply offended and refused to believe in him. Then Jesus told them, “A prophet is honored everywhere except in his own hometown and among his own family.” And so he did only a few miracles there because of their unbelief.”
Matthew 13:53-58 NLT
*Rejection of this people and his hometown
*All too uncommon heritage
*Faith-understand his message and experience his miracles
I'm just going to leave this here, when you start succeeding, people around you will work overtime to bring you down, and want you to fail. Jesus was rejected in his own hometown. Remember where your worth and identity is found. Keep trusting God. Keep saying yes to his plan for you.
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